Do you know that you have more to offer, but struggle to understand how to apply yourself in order to achieve your goals? Do you find it difficult to believe that you have the ability to fulfill your dreams and live the life that you have always wanted to have?

Many people struggle each and every day with a sense that they will never live up to their full and true potential. And unfortunately, many of those individuals will never overcome the personal mental barriers and fears that prevent them from accomplishing their life’s purpose.

But, there is good news for those who are willing to ask for help. With personal life coaching and personal development training, anyone can achieve their true potential. They can reach their goals and find that something special within themselves that will make their life feel more complete.

How Personal Life Coaching Can Help

So, what is personal life coaching exactly? Life coaching is a process for individuals to undertake with the help of a coach, who will have a number of conversations with the individual and provide mentoring and advice based upon what is needed by the client. During the process, individuals – or even groups – will be asked questions that help them to really examine their lives through a whole new set of eyes and from an unbiased, knowledgeable perspective.

Some questions will be relatively straightforward: are you happy with the way your life is going? What are you looking to improve in your life – the way you accomplish your work, the amount of and quality of time that you have for your family? Other questions will require more thoughtful answers.

These questions are designed to help the life development coach see to the obstacles that stand between the client and their ultimate success in realizing their goals. These questions encourage the life coach’s clients to focus on their fears, their challenges, and on whether or not they are committed to reaching their stated goals.

Developing A Path For Success

Based on the answers to all of the questions that a life coach asks – the easier and the more difficult questions – a life coach will work with his or her client to re-structure the way that the individual approaches their life, work and problems. In part, this may mean that the client will be thinking differently about how to solve problems or defining an effective strategy towards reorganizing their lives in a positive way. It may also mean that the client will begin to condition him or herself to actually reach his or her goals.

Sometimes, the personal life development coach will recognize that the individual’s real goals differ from his or her stated goals in a number of ways. When this happens, the life coach will help his or her client see the contradictions between their stated and real goals.

In order to help with this conditioning, a life coach is dedicated to teaching their client’s how to use tools that will boost their level of self-accountability. He or she will work with the client to help them overcome their fears and stumbling blocks, so they are better able to achieve their goals – their personal goals, their professional goals and even, in many cases, their financial goals.

Reaching goals, like life coaching itself, is a process. Unlike a therapist, a life coach will not work with his or her client to discover the roots of their problems. Instead of looking to the past, a life coach will help their client look to the future. At the end of the process, an individual will be able to clearly identify his or her goals and develop the tools and resources that are needed to achieve them.

Final Thoughts…

Whether the client desires to work towards owning and operating their own business, accelerating their career, finding balance between work and family, or merely looking for a way of identifying what will make them truly happy in their own lives, a personal life coach is an ideal partner.

It must be noted that the job of the life coach is not to take you from Point A to Point B; instead, he or she will help you to learn the mental tools that you will need to reach your destination on your own and to provide encouragement along the way.

“Logical thinking is the worst kind of thinking. Rational thinking is limited. You need exactly the kind of thoughts that does not look at the rational obvious. You need to think with a vision that sees the obvious without logical limitations or restrictions.”

In ages past we accepted that life was full of hardships. They grappled with huge animals in a desperate bid to kill them for food. The odds were simple; either succeed or starve, kill or be killed. As civilizations discovered fire and then electricity and gas to keep warm, bought food from markets and built houses of stone, people became less willing to deal with any unexpected events that threatened to turn their predicted life upside down.

Our minds drive us to achieve exactly what we believe we’re capable of achieving. This is good news because once we understand this and master the art of controlled thinking, then we can guide our destinies towards success.

Many people talk or write about the science of success or the art of creating wealth. You don’t want just the science. You don’t want just the art. What you want is the technology. The how to.

Manifestation is not a mystery. It is a process. All processes can be analyzed, taken apart, step-by-step, and then, once understood, can be applied scientifically to produce the desired results. There is a technique for manifesting anything, including wealth.

Your imagination, your thoughts, what you perceive, what you don’t perceive, what you see and what you miss, how you act, what you feel… these are all determined by one thing: your programming, what you repetitively tell yourself (and what you repetitively got told or observed during your youthful formation years). The programming stored in the human mind. It goes even further than that. Your subconscious mind controls almost everything about you.

For example, it controls your autonomic nervous system. What is that? Here is what the Microsoft Encarta encyclopedia says: “Autonomic Nervous System, in vertebrate anatomy, one of the two main divisions of the nervous system, supplying impulses to the body’s heart muscles, smooth muscles, and glands.

The power to create or manifest wealth comes from applying the knowledge of the process of creation. The knowledge of the critical elements in a process do not create the process. It is the proper and purposeful use or application of the elements that produce the results.

If you need to break the bonds of ‘I’m certain to fail this time too’ slavery:

1. Hold positive inner talk with yourself.

2. Surround yourself with positive people, mindfull people.

3. Think and feel ‘I’m going to succeed’ in all I ever do.

4. Think and feel ‘I’m a winner  in all I ever do’.

This is where a person starts. This is also the  only person you will have to convince – yourself. Other people are automatically convinced you’re great and a success, after you have convinced yourself. It takes some work, and work again to clear the mind and point to where you desire to go.

Recently I had the great pleasure of hearing one of my favorite bands, Groovelily, perform their original musical theater piece Striking 12 in New York City.  Before the show, as the band was warming up, the lead singer/violinist Valerie told us a powerful story.  Valerie had recently performed with her father at an event to celebrate his lifetime contribution as a cantor.  After the performance, an older woman came up to Valerie and told her about how she had played violin as a child in Germany and how much playing the violin had meant to her. She went on to explain that when her family fled the country during the Nazi regime, she was not allowed to bring her beloved violin with her to America because her family feared it would mark them as Jews.  So, she grew up, got married, and raised a family.  While she encouraged her son to play the violin (and he grew up to be a musician), she never indulged or rekindled her passion to play the violin again.  When the woman finished telling her story, she held Valerie’s hands tightly, looked her in the eyes, and emphatically said, “Keep on playing.”

Every time I hear this story I am deeply moved (yes, I love the band and have heard this fairly recent story multiple times already). I am moved because of my own ups and downs as an amateur musician who can think of a million excuses why I’m not good enough to be playing or how I shouldn’t be “wasting” time when there are so many other more important things to do. I am also moved because I am overwhelmed with the sheer amount of creation, beauty, joy, and passion that is missing in this world each day because so many people have abandoned their passions and joy for the much more “important” and “serious” business of life.

Take a moment right now and consider:

- What activities did you love to take part in as a child, teenager, or young adult?  Do you still partake in any of these or related activities?

- What did you dream about most wanting to be when you grew up?

- What are you doing when you feel the most joyful, passionate, or in the flow?  When was the last time you spent time doing this?

If you’re like most people I know, you’re probably laughing because it has been so long since you’ve done any of these things that you don’t even remember or you’re muttering a number of excuses as to why you can’t be doing these things.

Some of those excuses might sound like:

- I don’t have time

- There are more important things to do

- It’s impossible to do now that I have a wife/husband/mate, career, kids, house, etc.

- There’s no way I can ever have what I dreamed about, it was only a fantasy. After all, I’m middle aged, overweight, and out of shape and certainly not going to become an NBA, NFL, WNBA, Broadway star, or rock musician in this lifetime, so why bother at all.

Well, what if you could have and do what you most enjoy?  What if you could get in touch with the essence of what you really wanted and then go and do THAT?  For instance, perhaps what really appealed to you about becoming a rock musician was making music and sharing it with others.  You could achieve that dream at any age.  Pick up an old instrument you used to play and begin to take lessons again. Learn something new. Volunteer to share your music with kids, the elderly, or a church group. Another example could be that you loved the spirit of competition and physical challenge inherent in the dream of playing professional sports.  Well, you can have that too!  While you might not be the next Lance Armstrong or Serena Williams, there are many ways to get physically fit and be competitive in sports at any age.  I’ve seen athletes in the Masters division of different sports play with more heart and competitive spirit in their 70s, 80s, and 90s, than many young professional athletes exhibit.  I personally know people with demanding careers and families who regularly compete in triathlons and cycle, run, or walk untold numbers of miles each year for charity.  If they can do it, so can you.

My point is – you deserve to have joy, passion, and play in your life.  Yes, life can be serious at times and we all have responsibilities, but you owe it to yourself to really live a little and give yourself the gift of something just for you.  You’d be amazed at how just a little bit of time spent regularly on something that feeds your soul will yield results ten times over in the other “more serious” parts of your life.

This month, go in search of your long lost violin.  Dust off your guitar, tennis racket, paintbrushes, or writer’s pad.  Give yourself permission to rekindle the passion, find the joy, and PLAY.

Read the title again, carefully.  It doesn’t say “it takes more effort to get results.”  It says “it takes more than effort to get results.”  Ah, the difference a word can make.

In the world I grew up and live in, hard work is considered a high virtue.  I’ve read children’s books that spoke of the value of hard work.  I grew up on a farm and was proud to work hard.  Few compliments will be viewed as highly as, “They are a hard worker.” And most people I know consider persistence a highly valued trait.

And I suspect your world is much the same.

As I continue to learn and observe the world around me, I’m quite sure this is the whole story.

That doesn’t mean I don’t think effort is required, that work is necessary, or that action helps us reach our goals.  Of course, we need to take action to get results.  Of course work is required to achieve anything of value.  The quarrel I have is not with the word “work.”  It’s with the word “hard.”

Of course some things are hard work and always will be.  However hard work, taken to the extreme leads us to the equivalent of bashing our head against a concrete wall, figuring that eventually the wall will crack, and we will break through.  Can we break through the concrete wall and reach our objective using our head?  Perhaps, but I believe there are better ways to break through the wall!

While this analogy may be simple, and somewhat painful, I believe it holds an important element of truth for us all.  Why?  We all know there are better ways to break through a concrete wall than using our head.  As you read this I’m sure you can think of many tools that would allow you to us that while more easily and successfully while creating less pain and agony for yourself.

But unfortunately often people feel that hard work is necessary and that sacrifice is required for them to reach the things they desire.

The truth is, what we really need to do is work intelligently.  There are many things we can do to work more intelligently, including building our skills, our capacities, our network, and our experience.  All of these things are important.  But none of them are the most important.

What is the Most Important?

The most important key to reaching our objectives, with less “hard” work is within ourselves.  The most important key are the natural gifts and talents that lie within us, largely untapped and unrecognized.

In my experience there are two ways to mop the floor: on your hands and knees using a rag or standing in using a mop.  When we celebrate hard work, it’s like we are celebrating the rag.  If all you have is a rag, you can certainly get the floor clean.  On the other hand, if you knew there was a mop would you choose the rag?

So it is with our own natural gifts.  We have the mop, but we don’t often think about it or recognize it and therefore don’t use it.

Three Things You Can Do

Here are three things you can do today to begin to work more intelligently.

Identify your gifts and strengths.  In order to use the mop, you must know the mop exists.  In order for us to take advantage of our unique talents, abilities, strengths, and gifts we must know they are there.  This requires us to think about our strengths and ask others what our strengths are.  It will require time for reflection.  It will require time.  This task itself will require some effort.  But the effort is worth it.  Every time we use the mop, we gain time, save energy and complete a task more rapidly.  It’s time to find your mop!

Allow yourself to use them.  Once we know we have a mop, we have to allow ourselves to use it.  Maybe your mentor used a rag.  Maybe your mother used a rag.  While that might be the most successful way for them, that doesn’t necessarily mean it is for you.  Once you identified your gifts and talents, you must allow yourself to use them.  You must take the opportunity to use your unique gifts, because in using them, your results will seemingly flow from you.

Work on building them. Many of us when reviewing our skills will identify a list of both strengths and weaknesses.  This is an excellent exercise.  While it is important for us to recognize our weaknesses and work in many cases to improve them, it is equally important to continue to nurture and strengthen our greatest gifts and strengths.  Consider spending at least as much time nurturing and building your strengths as you do on improving or fixing your areas of weakness.  Again, you will get greater results for these efforts because they will come easier and more naturally.

When you do these three things, you’ll begin to make your work easier and more enjoyable.  At the same time, you will most likely find that your results will come sooner and more completely.

What could be better than that?  The results we want, with less effort and more enjoyment.

Remember, it takes more than effort to get results; it takes intelligent, informed, enlightened, effort.

It’s time to get to work.

Do you want to know the true secret to success in life and business? I am sure you do. Everyone wants to know this secret. If you have this secret in your heart and mind, if you live it, for you no limits will exist. It is really very simple. I myself discovered it by chance.

I love good food and a good cold beer. Nothing is free, the dues I had to pay for what I liked was a battle with weight. When the time came that I realized I needed to lose a few pounds I would go buy a fitness book and a nutrition book. I would actually read them and try some things I read. But it was day on day off and things would come up. I soon forgot why I wanted to do this and life went on. This occurred From time to time but nothing long term.

Not long after a 39 day stay in a hospital I stepped on the scale and looked in the mirror and realized I was 45 pounds overweight. My clothes didn’t fit and I as uncomfortable. I knew what I had to do. I had read all the books. But finally I knew if I didn’t take care of my  body it wouldn’t take care of me and I only had one life and one body.

How could I succeed now? I had tried this many times and only minor results. This time was different so the way had to be found. Everyday I planned a schedule. I became my own personal trainer and nutritionist. I planned out my meals and changed my tastes to eat to live not live to eat. I wrote myself into a book and created new habits that allowed me to achieve my goals. And that, my friends, is the secret.

I succeeded when I had failed so many times in the past. The truth is success had no chance until the habits put me on the right path. I learned a lesson from my weight loss success and have implemented it in all aspects of my life and business. Make habits that move you to your goals and it will make success a habit in your life.

I lost all the weight I wanted. I feel great. My business is moving and I feel great. I wrote a blueprint for my life and my business. There are challenges and difficulties, sure. But success is now a way of life for me because I discovered  that win/lose, succeed/fail, rich or poor, It’s in the Habit. Make lasting success your habit.

I’ve been having some discussions with my kids lately about “failure,” both theirs and mine. My son’s not getting the grades he wants, and I’m experiencing some professional setbacks I’m not happy with, and my daughter…well, she’s 8, and perfectly content with life, and I think that’s perfect.

But the question keeps coming up, “Is failure bad?”

I think the answer is, “It depends on what you do with it.”

Here’s what a lot of people do. Let’s take my professional situation. I’m working on a book. Say I put together a proposal, query 40 or 50 agents, and wait. Every agent says no, this is not what we’re looking for.

I throw the proposal in the trash and go on.

I’ve failed. It’s bad. I’ve given up on my dream of writing this book.

That is, indeed, failure. That’s when I’ve just flat-out not reached my dream. But think about why I didn’t reach it. I’ll come back to that in a minute.

Now imagine that after all 50 agents send the query back with a rejection, I sit down with my query letter and try to figure out what to say to get their attention and show them that I really have an idea and I really can write and promote the book. Then I send it to the next 40 or 50 agents on my list.

I failed, with the first 40 or 50. But I *succeeded* in getting beyond the failure. That’s good. I succeeded at three things: one, deciding that I wanted to continue; two, figuring out what I could do better; and three, continuing.

Every failure is an opportunity to try again, a little harder, a little better, with better information and more passion.

Failing’s not bad. Failing is how you move forward. Unless you give up. Giving up is bad. Failing is just locomotion.

Remember most interviewers will have made their minds up in the first 2 minutes.  Be on time, look the part and look as if you really want the job.

Think about job and the image you present.  It is your opportunity to impress not shock.  Be comfortable but dress the part.  Nails, hair should be clean and well presented, your shoes shiny, the interviewers should notice you rather than your jewellery or perfume/aftershave.

Smile, you need to show that you are enthusiastic

Think about how you sit, sit back in the seat but don’t sprawl.  Think about what you are going to do with your hands.

Make eye contact, it is usual to make the person who asked the question the person of main focus.  Remember to scan the panel so everyone feels included.  Looking at your hands, the floor or out of the window is a real turn off when you interview someone.

Most interviews start with a question about you…”So tell us a little about yourself.”  Prepare the answer so you can feel relaxed.  Think about the high lights rather than give a 10-minute ramble.

Watch the interviewers body language.  If they are falling asleep it is a bad sign.  You can always ask if they would like more information.

Prepare thoroughly, research what the job entails.  Consider the skills and knowledge base needed and do a self-audit comparing it with what you have to offer.  Enthusiasm and energy can often make up for lack of enthusiasm particularly if you make it obvious that you have done your research and have the potential to learn.

Most interviews are lost because the candidate doesn’t actually listen to the question.  Listen carefully; if you don’t understand what they want ask them to repeat the question.

Think about exactly what they are asking – what do they need to know? Is it referring to particular skills, knowledge, principles, understanding, your experience etc.

Use the question as a platform to sell yourself, but be honest.  If it is appropriate use the question to give concrete examples of what you have done/can do.  Be careful not to become anecdotal you must make a clear connection between the question and your answer.

If you don’t know something it isn’t the end of the world.  Interviewers would rather hear, “I don’t know but I’d be really keen to learn,” than discover too late that you have been dishonest.

Finally remember that most people who interview are also anxious, as the success of their business is dependent on appointing the right people.  Do your best, be yourself and if you don’t get the job ask for feedback on your interview.  In this way the interview becomes part of your professional development and not a failure.     Good Luck!

Positive thinking is making a conscious effort to think with an optimistic attitude and anticipate positive outcomes.  Positive behavior means purposely acting with energy and enthusiasm. When you think and behave positively, you guide your mind toward your goals and generate matching mental and physical energy.

Positive thinking and behavior are often deciding factors in landing a top job –   your first job, a promotion, a change of jobs – whatever career step you are targeting.  .

The function of your subconscious is to support your thoughts and behaviors by triggering matching psychological responses.  Research has proved that positive thinking and behavior have a powerful impact on personal performance, confidence and even health

Positive thinking causes the brain to generate matching, positive chemical and physical responses, such as increased mental alertness and physical energy, improved respiration and circulation, and increased beneficial endorphins.  Thinking positively actually boosts your ability to perform and project enthusiasm, energy, competence, and confidence – the qualities interviewers look for when they hire and promote candidates.

Negative thinking causes the brain to stimulate matching negative chemical and physical responses, such as increased blood pressure, reduced mental alertness, increased anxiety, decreased physical energy, and flight r fight reactions and responses.

These responses decrease energy, creativity, and performance and simultaneously erode self confidence.

Follow these steps to form the habit of positive thinking to boost your success.

1) Deliberately motivate yourself every day

Think of yourself as successful, and expect positive outcomes for everything you attempt.

2) Project  energy and enthusiasm

Employers hire people who project positive energy and enthusiasm.  Develop the habit of speaking, moving and acting with these qualities.

3) Practice this positive expectation mind-set until it becomes a habit.

Applicants who project enthusiasm and positive behavior generate a positive chemistry that rubs off.  Hiring decisions are largely influenced by this positive energy.  The habit will help you reach your peak potential

4) Dwell on past successes

Focus on past successes to remind yourself of your abilities will help you to attain your goals.

It does no good to yourself or your future if you dwell on past events.

Who cares for example that you had dealings with ungrateful individuals who were former lowlife criminals returning to their lifelong behaviors that took advantage of your good nature and skills  by  refusing  to pay you even for the cost of goods and supplies.  Focus on the future and you will get there.  Focus on the past and you will relive and repeat it.

As an example of focusing on past successes, no one is ever born learning how to ride a bicycle or certainly to repair and diagnose computer problems.

Through training, practice, and trial and error, you master new abilities.  During the trial-and- error phases of development remind yourself of past successes: look at mistakes as part of the natural learning curve. Continue until you achieve the result you want, and remind yourself that you have succeeded in the past and can do so yet again.  You will fail only when you quit trying.

The importance of positive thinking and behavior can not be understated in your job search and / or career and new job promotions.  Remember that everyday is a new life to a wise man.

There are many instances in life where your confidence is hit hard. Sometimes you overcome life’s hardness, sometimes you get overwhelmed. Sometimes your courage and confidence sees you through, but sometimes your self-confidence gets a beating. However, the point here to remember is that “Nobody can hurt you without your consent.” The problem is not as important as the impact it had on you, rather the impact that YOU let the problem create on you. In life pain is inevitable but suffering is optional, as the saying goes. It’s purely your choice, and whether you choose to bounce back or suffer is entirely your prerogative.

There can be many reasons that your self-confidence is hurt. You may have had a bad marriage and now are heading for a divorce. You were not chosen for your college’s football team; you may have been laid off. There’s definitely a lot of pain involved in any of the situations. But you don’t necessarily have to suffer. You must arise and resolve to get back your confidence.

The following ways would help you do just that.

Look at the brighter side

If you have been laid off, it would be okay to feel bad about it for a day or two but not more than that. Losing a job is a terrible thing, but it does not mean the end of the world. Who knows it might be a blessing in disguise. Maybe you have got some time to review your life, get aware of where you are going, have a look at your likes and hobbies which you could not develop because of pressures of your job. Maybe this is an opportunity to start afresh and live your life a new way which is more in sync with your abilities and aptitude. Similarly, a divorce may cause great pain but then you weren’t too happy in your marriage either. It probably was just not meant to be. Now you have a chance to rebuild your life the way you want it to be.

Stop comparing yourself with other people

When we have a problem we always question God – “Oh, God, why me?” Certainly God gave you a lot of rewards as well. Did you then get up and ask God -”Oh God, why me?” That’s what human nature is all about. We complain and remember God when we are in trouble or else we are too busy with ourselves. Stop looking at other people who seem too happy and comfortable to you from a distance. Stop comparing their comfort with your suffering. This will only frustrate you further. Focus on yourself and make every effort you can make to go out whenever you are feeling down. Self-pity is very addictive and capable of destroying lives. Instead of indulging in self-pity (though we all do from time to time), take control of your life and take responsibility for your actions, learn from your mistakes and make a fresh start. And yeah…don’t be bogged down when you hear a “NO”. A “NO” is something which even greats like Edison and Ford, too, had to face. If you look at them positively, you will find that each “NO” actually takes you closer to a “YES.” It’s been reported time and time again that Edison conducted more than a thousand failed experiments before he actually made an electric bulb! So get going and take the an occasional no in stride.

Are you standing in your own way

You will notice that shadows are caused when we stand in the path of sunshine. In our lives, too, we cause a lot of shadows by standing in the way of our own happiness. In today’s world, it is important to be flexible. A lot of people will look for a job for months, yet still reject work coming their way because they are not willing to adapt to some new job requirements. Jane, a schoolteacher, was laid off from her job. She kept trying for months to get a job as a teacher while rejecting opportunities such as taking private tuitions, being a nanny, doing copy-editing work as a freelancer. The long wait hurt her self-confidence even more. Sometimes it is wise to be a little flexible and adapt ourselves to new job demands rather than to look exactly for what we lost. It helps regain confidence quickly which brings along enough energy to get an even better job in the field of your choice!

Did you know that… you can instantly know whether you will be successful or not?

All of us want to be successful, but there is a big difference between what we want and what we have.

Today, I will give you the clue to know whether what you are doing now in your life will lead you to a successful future or not.

You will not be anymore moving around without confidence in what your future will be. You will know without any doubt whether you are on the right track or you are moving towards a disappointing future.

Here is the secret revealed by Michael Korda: “Your chances of success are directly proportional to the degree of pleasure you derive from what you do.”

Yes, your success in life is measured by the degree of pleasure you are experiencing with what you are doing.

No real success can be achieved without loving what you do. You can only really excel when you love what you do, you can’t achieve maximum performance until you love what you do, and you will not have enough motivation to persist on your goals without loving what you do.

If you hate what you do now, whatever it is, then you have very low chances of success.

Just think of it.

I know that you may tell me, “What can I do? I am in a college that I hate but must finish?” or “I have a job that I can’t leave due to a lot of responsibilities; especially financial ones”

I agree with all of that and will not tell you to go now and leave what you are doing whatever it is because you will not be successful at the end.

What I want to tell you is that you must be on a path where you love what you do. And to do that you have to start now to define your life purpose.

Defining your life purpose is the first step towards a satisfactory and successful life. You have to know the path that will let you live with passion and make a difference to other people’s life.

When you discover your life purpose you will have the power to do little changes, one at a time, until you are aligned with the right direction; the direction of your life purpose and your ultimate destiny.

You will not change your path in a night. But you can start now under your current situation doing the necessary preparation and doing very small changes that will build up and at a certain time with another small change you will be on the right track.

Here is the secret again “Your chances of success are directly proportional to the degree of pleasure you derive from what you do.”

Past is past. Search for your life purpose now to survive your future and live with passion.

Don’t you agree with me that you will only succeed when you do what you love?

My friend you can make a difference.

I believe in you.